IPoIB/cm: Optimize stale connection detection

In the presence of some running RX connections, we repeat
queue_delayed_work calls each 4 RX WRs, which is a waste.  It's enough
to start stale task when a first passive connection is added, and
rerun it every IPOIB_CM_RX_DELAY as long as there are outstanding
passive connections.

This removes some code from RX data path.

Signed-off-by: Michael S. Tsirkin <mst@dev.mellanox.co.il>
Signed-off-by: Roland Dreier <rolandd@cisco.com>