dlm: reject messages from non-members

Messages from nodes that are no longer members of the lockspace should be
ignored.  When nodes are removed from the lockspace, recovery can
sometimes complete quickly enough that messages arrive from a removed node
after recovery has completed.  When processed, these messages would often
cause an error message, and could in some cases change some state, causing
problems.

Signed-off-by: David Teigland <teigland@redhat.com>